Gulp!

A 30-year-old female presents with memories of her childhood pediatrician and years of reading through health books, including the Merk Manual. Upon examination, she is ruled-out for high fever and delirium. Her pupils, skin and heart rate appear normal. She is beginning to shows signs of crows-feet, however. She complains of a desire to practice medicine one day. Paged psych consult. Premliminary diagnosis: Futurerae Doctoritis.

It's done. It has been did! I am swallowing my medicine and I am taking the plunge to go back to school and become a doctor. I've read books, done research and made career lists. I have volunteered in hospitals as a teenager and as an adult and found a great comfort inside those stark walls. I wear scrubs to bed and dream that one day this could be my daily uniform. It's just taken me longer to take the leap into what will be a long, sacrificial, arduous, draining profession. Sign me up!

Medicine gets both a good and bad wrap. Yes, it's a tough, stressful job at times, but it is also an amazingly rewarding one. What other career allows you to examine the human body, birth babies, sometimes open up a person to take a look inside and sometimes watch someone slip away into death. I began to realize most recently that the reason only a select few choose medicine for a career is because it does hit close to home. Doctors are humans dealing with other humans, who are not always in the best of shape. Perhaps the thought of being in contact with your own mortality is too much for many to bear. For me, I recognize it will be challenging, but I also find it fascinating - even an adrenaline rush.

My steps toward medicine have been years in the making, but took some time to actualize. That's okay. I am going to be 40 either way. Might as well be doing something I enjoy.