Orgo Chem! How I Love Thee Again!

Organic Chemistry and I have a love/hate relationship. One minute I am lamenting the class, and the next I am skipping down the street singing Stevie Wonder's "You Are the Sunshine of My Life."

I got an 80 on my exam. I know that doesn't seem like much to many of you. But an 80 on an exam that the class averaged a 70 on is not bad. And, I really should have gotten an 87, but I made 7 stupid, one point, mistakes that I will never do again.

I actually like the material and the challenge, but I am really ready to get my hands dirty in biology and human anatomy. Stuff that is tangeable and more applicable to my future career.

Two more exams to go. Can I eek out a B in this class?

The New Do!

I chopped my hair off two weeks ago. It was about 3 and half inches past my shoulders, and I had partially grown it that long to give away to Locks of Love or some other wig making service for patients. However, when I first went to the hairdresser to consult about chopping my hair off, we agreed on chin length, which would not have been enough to give away.

YET, when I went into actually get the hairs cut, she went way higher, and it was a waste of hair on the floor around me that went straight to the trash (you have to cut a full pony tail in order to give away.) Alas, here it is anyway. It's been a nice change.

MD vs. PA vs. NP

Everyone always asks me, "what is the difference between MD and PA, and also what is the difference between PA and NP?"

Here is a fantastic video explaining the differences. Essentially, being a PA, you have patients, treat, diagnose, prescribe with a physician working in the same practice to supervise if ever needed. Also, as a PA, you can change specialties as you like, allowing you to learn more medicine and move around for more experiences.

Roll tape:

I Called Do Over!

This has been a big week. Three major things happened. Barack Obama was elected President Elect of the United States, I decided to pursue Physician Assistant instead of MD and I chopped my hair off.

Wait...rewind! Yes, I have made a final, final, no turning back decision. I am pursuing being a Physician Assistant instead of a MD. The truth is, it's not really because of the work load. It's more because my personality identifies more so with PAs than MDs. My main goal is to do patient care. Not to fulfill some ego trip of being called Doctor. Yes, it has a nice ring to it, but I just want to help people, and the sooner I can do that the better. There are more options today than even 20 years ago on what you can do in health care to make a major difference. And, personally, I am a woman and I want children. It's doable as a MD, but there is far more work involved. Not that I didn't know all of this before. I knew it well. But, visiting a couple of medical schools with PA programs last week taught me some valuable lessons. And, I walked away saying, "I will always wonder 'what if?'" The grass is always greener and you can have regrets until the cows come home and milk the chickens. But, in the end, all we want to be is happy and in love. We don't need glory or validation. We just need to add our touch to leaving the world a better place.

And....then I cut all of my hair off. Actually, I hadn't planned on such a major change, but change happened regardless. Kind of like life, no?

I wouldn't change the story of my life so far for anything. But, there are times I do not look back on happily. I do have regrets. I don't dwell on them now, but they do exist. I hopefully will learn from them.

My dad used to say, "no regrets, no excuses." I think it's an admirable motto to live by, albeit, sometimes unrealistic. The idea of the statement is that if you make no excuses for yourself, you will have no regrets. In essence, it's truth. But, in the messy human world, it's something to which you can aspire.

I still have a hard road ahead, but I am truly happy with my decision, and I actually feel a little lighter because of it. I don't have a regret, and I don't foresee a regret. For the first time, in many months, even years, I feel informed and decisive. I am going to be a PA, and a great PA at that. And, I just don't care what anyone else might think of that.

So there.

Like Understanding How Fax Machines Work

Organic Chemistry sucks! I like the material, but hate the tests....because I do poorly.

Please, tell me, why do I need to know the flow of electrons when my patient asks me why his poop is yellow?

An Honorable Speech

I am so proud of John McCain for his speech last night. It was very clear that the last year of hard work and sacrifice, which came to an unexpected close for him, weighed heavily.

But, the John McCain we saw last night, was the John McCain I used to love and respect. Eight years ago, it was John McCain for whom I wanted to cast my vote. That was until the derisive conservative right undermined his campaign and his family. A truly low-blow and a shameful moment in American politics.

But, fast forward to 2008, and the same conservatives who destroyed McCain are the ones who helped shape his campaign this year. And the pick of Sarah Palin (a choice he did not make with full confidence), who stirred more devisions through her speeches and less unity among Americans, was a real disappointment. A spade is a spade is a spade, and it was clear that McCain 2008 was not McCain of even 2000 and certainly not the McCain who valiantly fought for our country and brutally suffered and endured years of torture for its freedom.

Thank you John McCain for your service and your continued service. Be true to yourself from here on out.

We Did It!

For almost six months now, I have felt tense about this election. Worried, that a country that elected George W. Bush to two terms, would make a horrible mistake once again, and deny the highest post in the world to the most deserving candidate.

Four years ago, when John Kerry lost the presidential election and Bush entered the office for another four years, I felt sad for our country. I felt consumed by mediocrity and the fact that our place in the world would surely fall a few notches. It did. And, most in part, because the rest of the world, and Americans themselves, look to our leaders to set the tone for quality, organization, inspiration and movement upward. Unfortunately, Bush brought a sense of banality to the presidential office and a rogue disregard for outside opinion and thoughtful consideration of what ails the world.

Last night, I never felt more proud to say, "I am an American!" The dream of what America stands for is not a "fairytale" as President Clinton said about Obama. The dream of America is alive and kicking. It's a dream come true in our next president, Barrack Hussein Obama. I just love the way that sounds. So, diverse, colorful and tolerant.

And behind the dream there is substance. President-elect Obama is intelligent, thoughtful and reasonable. He has a history of surrounding himself with conservative, liberals and independents so that he can get a full perspective of the issues. What a breath of fresh air we breath today.

Not everything will be perfect. We have quite the mess of things at home and abroad. But, one of the great qualities of the president of the United States is that when done well, he or she can inspire the nation and the world to work toward success. Because he can't do it alone.

My biggest take away from President-elect Obama's speech in Chicago's Grant Park (named for the Union Army General Ulysses S. Grant who fought for the end of slavery - how poignant) last night was this: he needs our help. He needs the American people to give back. I've been thinking for some time that I would join the National Health Services Corp after I achieve my degree in medicine. Last night's speech made it all that more important to do this. And, if not the NHSC, I have also thought of enlisting in one of the armed forces to help pay for my schooling. In the end, I would owe 3 -4 years of service. I couldn't feel more ready to accept that honor.

Thank you Obama for working so hard to realize this dream for America and the world. It couldn't have happened anywhere else but the U.S.A!